They CAN … yes, it’s totally possible from the perspective of psychological logistics & neurophysiology. Don’t believe people who say NDP’s “can’t” change or recover. They have simply not done enough of their own homework or they are biased per the list below.
However, you can trust people who say that most NPD’s “won’t” recover. That is (statistically speaking) fairly accurate. The reasons are several:
- NPD’s get rewarded in our culture … they don’t have high motivation to change
- Change for the NPD is VERY destabilizing … a LOT of fear & shame has to come up, out and be faced for them to recover. Most consider themselves “too busy” to make this extended effort but actually, that’s just an expression of fear from unconscious evolutionary “homeostasis preservation” processes.
- Many counselors got into this field because they themselves were traumatized early by Cluster-B personalities. Until they have done TONS of their own personal work, they are too triggered to work effectively with these patients.
- Even counselors who’ve done enough of their work to NOT be triggered in-session by the NPD, may not have the specialized skills required for this kind of work.
In my opinion, if you know someone who is willing, somatic therapies (like Hakomi or Somatic Experiencing) are the best approaches for this particular personality strategy.
Dewey Gaedcke’s answer to What are the benefits of seeking therapy?