It seems to me that both your language and your analysis are not yet very precise. There are HUNDREDS of types of therapy … how many have you tried? And for how long??
Lets start with a few WELL UNDERSTOOD and VALIDATED FACTS
- Emotional and psychological suffering derives largely from repetitive loops or patterns (aka thoughts, attitudes, stories, viewpoints, emotions) in the human nervous system
- We do know how to change and slowly reorganize the nervous system … specifically, through practice and repetition
Given those two facts above, it’s a total non-starter for laymen (people not trained in the science and methods) to make the blanket claim that “therapy doesn’t work”
Thats like saying “lifting weights does not make my muscles more dense” …
Sorry, thats wrong!! You may not NOTICE the change, but we actually do know how muscles work, and so this overly simplistic claim is just mistaken
BUT, it is true that there are 100’s of models or modes of therapy … many different patterns for changing and retraining the nervous system
And so it CAN BE REASONABLE to theorize that “therapeutic technique ABC may not help much for emotional pattern XYZ”
Yes, you can make THAT CLAIM without totally breaching logic and sanity, but it’s very risky to do so. And here is why you could still be wrong …
The problem MAY LIE with therapeutic technique ABC being totally ineffective, but it’s just as (probably more) likely that:
- You have a shit therapist
- You haven’t being doing it long enough
- You have improved but the change is too subtle for you to notice it yet
- Technique ABC is not a good fit for your specific constellation of symptoms
- The (unconscious) homeostasis preservation mandate is stalling or sabotaging you
If you read the above carefully, you will see that ANY ASSUMPTION that hinders your progress (by generating hopelessness and making you give up) is VERY DANGEROUS, UNLESS you have another tool ready to help you change.
As you get older, your nervous system gets a bit more calcified and slow to change, and so you are only hurting yourself by clinging to this factually tenuous claim.
I would actively question this claim unless
a) you really want to keep these same problems for years to come
or
b) you have very high confidence in another approach to change
Otherwise, you are simply (and a bit arrogantly) sentencing yourself to zero progress when people who know better are telling you it’s unnecessary
Good luck!!
Dewey Gaedcke’s answer to What are the benefits of seeking therapy?
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