The unconscious mind as a many important & automatic programs running from our long evolutionary past. Even though we are (in most modern western societies today) no longer endangered by foreigners and “outsiders”, there is still a Xenophobic program running on your hardware. You may say “I love foreigners” but it’s still there … it’s just currently being inhibited. In certain conditions of stress, it can gain more momentum.
One of the largest imperatives of the unconscious mind is preservation of homeostasis.
“preservation of homeostasis” means —- keep things from changing so much that it’s going to destabilize my identity or coping mechanisms.
So your question applies to ALL HUMANS … not just those with BPD.
Most of us will stay in therapy for YEARS if not much changes. But go talk to any senior therapist with many gray hairs, and they will tell you that it’s incredibly common for people to abandon therapy RIGHT WHEN major change is on the horizon.
Master therapists will admit they saw this frequently in their less experienced years. After seeing it so many times, the best have generally crafted tools to mitigate the problem. But this speaks to their deep understanding of your unconscious, not the absence of a deep desire to run from threatening change.
Dewey Gaedcke’s answer to What makes it hard for some people with BPD to stick to therapy?
Dewey Gaedcke’s answer to How often do highly empathetic parents cause highly narcissistic children?