You can start by ending this project of setting yourself up for failure by postulating hopeless (and flat false) realities.
“I am born a coward” …. really??
Are you a geneticist, biologist or psych researcher??
I didn’t think so … I also don’t think you are dumb
Does it make you curious that a non-dumb person would accept and repeat such a stark and hopeless reality, without ANY credentials or scientific basis to do so?? It should make you very curious!!
So when you see otherwise smart people, making up assertions and conjectures that they have NO BUSINESS (no qualifications) making, you can rightly conclude that some unconscious process is in charge.
So rather than deal with DSM labels and other such nonsense (that you are also unqualified to assess or use), start with the very simple step of saying to yourself:
“Wow … some part of me wants to remain stuck, and so it put forth, and influenced me to accept, this crazy story that that my situation is hopeless … genetic, from-birth, irrevocable
And once you get clear on THAT reality, you can start to study what needs this powerful and influential guy is going for … how did he pull the wool over your eye’s like this?