This answer is going to feel like gaslighting … I’m sorry, but I can’t see any other way to do it and still shoot you straight!
If needed, you can accuse me of all of my selfish & manipulative reasons for deceiving you in the comments, and we can walk through them one by one. Keeping a focus on how I’m manipulating and stealing from you will be a great way to avoid facing the fear that I call out below.
- don’t self diagnose
- don’t conflate what your CONSCIOUS mind is doing, vs the agenda of the unconscious
- don’t imagine you are at the bottom of a problem; it influences you to stop digging (or quit therapy)
- as shown in this answer, even when a therapist DOES SEE SOMETHING, it’s frequently not the time to bring it forward; you cannot yet know what she sees in you
- if you believe you are qualified to 2nd guess your therapist, and run your own program, then its (likely quite delusional, but also) a sign of deep fear in your unconscious. (see below)
- These assumptions on your part indicate a profound blindness to how deep (and more nuanced) an unconscious strategy can go. This is not Checkers or anything resembling linear.
I’ll be the first to admit that many therapists are not very good. But that fact alone (that going through training is not enough), should illuminate BIG ODDS that the average laymen is much worse. Especially when dealing with your own psyche. And if you understand “[homeostasis preservation](https://www.quora.com/search?q=homeostasis%20preservation&author=84795924 “www.quora.com”)”, you will recognize that strong incentives in your unconscious a very biased to getting it wrong.
I truly don’t know if your therapist is skilled … and neither do you. But this question does tell me something inside you is quite frightened and as a result, is mis-calculating some of its rationalizations.
Dewey Gaedcke’s answer to What are the benefits of seeking therapy?